it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
