Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
