walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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