She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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