found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
