you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
We got so high we made milksteak
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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