You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
