I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
