i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
