If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I don't deserve a penis
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
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