dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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