I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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