I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
