handjob tips. give me some.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
