it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
