That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize