She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
