I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
