Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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