would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
