Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
my liver is dry heaving
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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