Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
