i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
