I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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