I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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