Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
