what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize