According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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