I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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