yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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