no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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