anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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