I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
