Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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