I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Randomize
