I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
