I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
