The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
My vagina just clenched in fear
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
