Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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