remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I could fuck to npr.
Randomize
