I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Randomize
