I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
