btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
