If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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