we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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