I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
this boner is exhausting
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
