Dual....:-)
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
