Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
