you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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