If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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